I don't know what it is about sports that makes me such as fan, but I'm hooked. With the NBA playoffs, NHL playoffs, end of many of the European soccer leagues, and ofcourse the World's Strongest Man comeptition on ESPN, it's been a good time for watching sports. That last one was a joke. Everytime, I see a 350-lb behemoth with thighs the size of my torso pulling a tractor with his teeth, I can't help but laugh.

Getting back on track, the San Jose Sharks are out of the playoffs (courtesy of a strong Calgary club), the Warriors were never in it, and the A's, Giants, and Earthquakes are too early in their season to get excited about, but I'm still genuinely excited about the games that are going on. I often find myself screaming at the television or yelling at the top of my lungs. Even when I'm watching games alone....pathetic, I know. Maybe that's what's so great about these games. You invest a lot of time and effort to watch a 2 to 3 hour game, and you want to be rewarded with an exciting play or series of plays at the end of the game. Even though my home teams are out, I can still appreciate a last second Reggie Miller 3-pointer, or a great defensive save by Khabibulin. Here are some highlights of the past couple of weeks:

-in the EPL (English Premier League), Arsenal goes a whole season, which lasts nine months, undefeated. This hasn't been done since 1888, and it's especially a feat when you consider soccer games go 1-0 or 3-2, or something like that. With their French striker Thierry Henry, and a world class French midfielder in Patrick Viera, they should be known as the French Connection.




-Everybody loves an underdog, and hates a playa. Manchester United, also of the EPL, Real Madrid of la Liga in Spain, the LA Lakers, the NY Yankees are all uber-teams who have spent hundreds of millions for their player roster. Each team has had a tough go at it some time in their season.

Real Madrid is highly touted as the best team in world soccer, but they really laid an egg this year. It seemed so promising at first. They bought David Beckham from the Mancs, had arguably the best player in the world already on their roster, Zenadine Zidane, the best striker in the world in Ronaldo, and one of the most deadliest shots in the leg of Roberto Carlos. But they let go a lot of their proven midfielders and defenders for younger Spanish players like Pavon and Raul. Beckham proved to be a one-trick pony, Ronaldo's fat ass is always getting injured, and their team chemistry couldn't buffer a titration (you have to be a dork like me to understand this last metaphor). They fell to third place in the last weeks of the season, and completely imploded in their last 4 games, losing each one handily, as well as losing their composure in the last match against relegated Real Murcia. Becks, the only no-spansih speaking player on the Galacticos roster, was given a red card for calling the lineman a "Puta!", a less than cordial name for a female dog. Looks like Becks might be returning to the Premier League, most likely in a Chelsea uniform.



Becks: "Really, Posh, I didn't sleep with my assistant."

Even though the Minnesota Timberwolves are the number 1 seed in the Western Conference, their still seen as the underdog. Fortunately, they came away from the first two games of the Western Conference finals against the Lakers with a 1-1 split. They had a convincing win tonight against the Lakers, where Shaq looked human, Malone looked his age, and Kobe didn't pull a Jordan.



Kobe: "Uh, these guys aren't that bad. I'd rather be in Colorado."

Heck, a number 6 seed in the NHL is threatening to win the Stanley Cup. I'm talking about the Calgary Flames, and this might be the year for a Canadian team to finally win the cup after almost ten years of American teams winning it. The Tampa Bay Lightning may have an objection to that since they are making their own run for the cup. Hockey in Tampa Bay? Now that's the epitome of an underdog.

-Game 5 of the Lakers/Spurs series saw an amazing last second (at least that's what it seemed to be at the time), fadeaway, no look shot from Tim Duncan over the long arms of Shaquille O'Neal. A 1-100 shot at best, but it hit nothing but net. The Spurs celebrated mightily, but left 0.4 seconds on the clock. It would take a seemingly impossible shot by the likes of Kobe Bryant or a lob pass and dunk by Shawuille O'Neal to win the game. With the Spurs defense shadowing those two players, little-used Derek Fisher caught the ball and in one motion, turned around, faded away, and let go a 17-feeter that wento ver the outstretched arms of Manu Ginobili, and into the net. Can you say turning point? No doubt, the Spurs would have won that series if not for that Fisher miracle.

All of this sports-watching has me wondering, "How can I get a piece of the action?" Well, nothing gives me more joy than hooping on a bunch of scrubs, or ripping up a downhill on my hardtail, or even kicking my wife's ass in a game of scrabble. It's no professional league or olympic event, but it's a challenge, and being able to face those challenges and overcome them gives me more satisfaction than any game on TV.



Foiled by a little kid. Yikes.

Donald Rumsfeld needs to step down. And while we're at it, Bush should be impeached. I know the argument that most people are saying, "why hold the secretary of defense responsible for the actions of a bunch of lowly makeshift prison guards?" I have the answer to that question:

-because Rumsfeld, Cheney, and Bush set up the current environment of disdain for Americans with their cowboy bullshit.
-because someone should be held accountable for the egregious act of exaggerating the "weapons of mass destruction" and "yellow cake from Africa' bullshit.
-because now, muslims all over the world hate Americans more than ever, and so does everyone else.

Now people are getting beheaded left and right, suicide bombers are more rampant than ever, and the Bush administration has made the US into another Israel. It's only a matter of time before they hit US soil once again.

After 9/11, I wanted all of those responsible to pay for their crimes. Osama Bin Laden and his cronies, supporters, sympathizers, etc should be hung up by their sac and beaten with a stick. I didn't care if the US torture, assassinate, or bomb every last perpetrator. I still feel this way. Instead, Bush and his staff has focused their attention on such stupid-ass shite: fictional weapons of mass destruction, the moon, "the sanctity of marriage", etc.

Those MP prison guards who committed those horrible acts should be court-martialed and punished to the full extent of the law. That chick whose lawyer is saying she was just following orders should be hog-tied and beaten with rolled up posters of herself giving the thumbs up to the camera. Those people who beheaded the American contractor and American journalist in Pakistan should be eaten alive by hissing cockroaches. And Carrot Top should be forced to watch videos of his own act repeatedly for months until his freakish tranny head explodes.

I don't want to hear none of this bullshit....evildoers, enemies of freedom, axis of evil crap. Frankly I'd rather hear the repetitive creaking of the oval office chair when Clinton was in office (you know what I'm sayin'). At least then, the world was a much better place.

It's been a month now, and I haven't had a chance to write about our little trip to LA. In early April, Jo, Ron, and I went to LA for 3 days. I usually hate LA, but I had fun this time around. We went to a couple of memorable places:

a) Universal Studios - unlike the last time I went here, we actually spent most of the day in the park. I went with Jo, da cousin, Noel, and Jerome about 4 years ago, and we drove from 12 am to 6am. Once we got to LA, we had no idea what we were supposed to do! Universal was going to open up in three hours, and we were all tired as hell. JJ insisted that we ALL stay awake in the car. D'oh! Once we got into Universal, we literally went on three rides, and by Noon, we all wanted to crash and sleep.

This time around, we rode pretty much everything we wanted to ride, including the T2 3-D show, the Shrek 4-D show, the usual tram, and Back to the Future. My bro got us in for free; all we had to do was halfway dress up into something business casual, and wear some work badges past the security back entrance. It was funny as hell; Jo was Amy Fisher, I was Terrence Chiu, and Ron was some Japanese guy. We kept calling each other those names the whole day.



Ron's in the shark.










Amy, Terrence, and some japanese guy


John also got the hookup on a theme suite at the Sheraton Universal. Our room had a bunch of posters and memorabilia in it. The bathroom had "Bates Motel" on the towels and shit. He even got the front desk to give us some Korbel and chocolate strawberries for not getting us a big suite. What a bro. Here's a pic of Ron inside our room: